I have to say that overall I had a pretty good weekend. The only kind of bad thing was that on Saturday it rained and rained and continued raining pretty much all day. I didn’t have any outdoor plans though so it wasn’t a big deal. I just had to take my umbrella with me everywhere I went. I heard today on the news that we got over 8 inches of rain on Saturday which was a new single day record for this area. I believe it too because roads everywhere were closed due to flooding. There’s a forest preserve nearby that has a lake and the lake flooded. I drove by it on Sunday and it was still overflowing. I know there are fish in there too I hope none of them got hurt. A few years ago I got into fishing and went there one day but came up empty. It was really windy that day though so that didn’t help.

My weekend actually got started on Friday night. I went with my coworker friend Jill to see the movie IT. She is a big horror fan and is single and none of her friends wanted to go so she asked me. We are strictly work friends there is no romantic vibes at all between us in case you were wondering. I’m not big on going to see movies but IT has been out for a long time now so I knew it wouldn’t be crowded. I don’t understand the appeal of going to see a movie when the theater is full. Even when you have the recliner seats you are still very close to some complete stranger who is usually scarfing down popcorn. It just annoys me and I can’t enjoy the movie as I’m constantly distracted. That wasn’t the case Friday night though and we both really enjoyed the movie. We also agreed to go see the next one whenever it comes out.

Saturday morning I met up with my parents for breakfast. They live about an hour away and we usually do breakfast together once a month. We take turns on picking where we go but try to stick to around a halfway point between us. After breakfast I came back home and got all my laundry and cleaning done so that was out of the way. I usually do that Friday nights if I’m not doing anything but as you’re aware I had plans. I then went over to my friend Jeff’s house to watch some college football. My team the USC Trojans were on and they won in convincing fashion. It was pretty much over halfway through the 3^rd quarter. After the game we met up with some other friends to watch the UFC card. I’m not that much into MMA fighting but it was fun to watch and I always have fun hanging out with that crowd.

Sunday was of course NFL geared. I went back over to Jeff’s house to watch all the games.  I’m in multiple fantasy football leagues this year. I really got into it last year and even joined some leagues that were not cheap to enter. I have been doing ok so far but in my one league from work I took a big hit with Aaron Rodgers getting hurt. They are saying he broke his collarbone and will be out for the rest of the year. That isn’t good as my only other quarterback right now is Carson Palmer. He isn’t bad but he’s not going to put up the kind of points I was getting with Rodgers. I’m glad that one was only $25 to get in.

My birthday is in two weeks and today my wife Amanda asked me what I wanted as a gift from her. We always buy something for each other and usually we tell each other what we want. In the beginning of our relationship we would surprise each other and there were some gifts from both sides that sort of struck out. One year she bought me a really nice and expensive cordless razor. She knew I wasn’t a real big fan of shaving in general but I have to for my job. It was a good idea but I couldn’t use it. I didn’t like how it worked and it made me get some nasty razor burn no matter what I tried. I felt bad but she had to return it. I think we went out to a nice dinner with the money she got back from it.

The one time I swung and missed with getting her something was a lot worse. She had just started a new job and was in need of some new outfits to wear to work. I don’t know what I was thinking but I decided to get her an outfit for every day of the work week. That would be 5 different outfits if you aren’t keeping score at home. Out of the 5 she ended up only keeping 1 of them. The rest much like the cordless razor was returned. We didn’t go out to dinner with that money instead I let her pick out her own clothes. That was and will be the last time I ever buy her anything like that. She is extremely picky when it comes to what she wears. She is also apparently hard to shop for with her size.  She’s small and wears either an extra small or small depending on the brand. I’ll never forget the look on her face when she tried to pretend that she liked everything that I got her.

I’m not really sure what I’m going to tell her to get me this year. I have a few different ideas but nothing is really jumping out at me. One thing I think would be nice is going to see my favorite team play. I haven’t been to a Bears game in years and with how their season is going so far their tickets shouldn’t be in high demand. Amanda is not into football at all so I’d probably take my brother Rob or one of my friends. I’ll have to look at their schedule and some ticket prices before I decide on that. I’m not sure how she would feel about buying me those for my birthday either. She might bet upset I’m not celebrating with her.

Another thing I was thinking about was a weekend away with her. We haven’t done something like that in a long time. We wouldn’t even have to go far. We live in the Chicago suburbs so just going into the city would be fine by me. There is always something to do in the city. We haven’t been to Lincoln Park Zoo in years and that is actually free. It is really weird to have a zoo in the middle of such a big city. I always thought it was weird anyways. I wouldn’t mind going to Shedd Aquarium too. I can’t even remember the last time we were there. I just remember it gets really crowded so I’d want to get there early to beat the rush.

The only other thing I can think of are all weather mats for my truck. I still have the carpet ones that came with it when I bought it last year. I’ve been meaning to replace them but have not gotten around to it. Maybe I’ll tell my wife those 3 options and have her surprise me.

As I consider what I want to do, it strikes me that there are a bunch of things I could be doing that I”m not really sure about.  I have plenty of things set up but I”m not entirely sure how I want to do all of these things.  Mostly though it’s just that I”m trying to decide how I want to handle some of the thing I Have to do.  For example, my hobbies are things that I can do pretty much wherever I want because they involve things that I already have.  But then I was thinking about some of the things I would like to try and some of the stuff like that and it’s basically an issue of me figuring out what I want to do.  The people I know have been pretty cool and I don’t know that I want to go somewhere where I wouldn’t’ be around them but I guess if you are doing what you want it will put you into a place where you maybe can meet additional.  And then I was thinking about my job.  Because I kind of like what I do, it’s not like I necessarily want to find another job.  And this is part of it.

My friend was telling me about how he wants to get a new job and he doesn’t know how he should go about it.  He is looking at nurse jobs because that’s his specialty but he isn’t sure exactly what he wants to do with that.  And then it was kind of silly because I think that he should just do that.  Bu then I was going to see if there was anything I might want to do as well because I’m not entirely sure that I would like to stay where I am even though I do like my job.  There might be something else that could work so I don’t know if that’s something I can search for or if I should continue where I am and wait until something opens.

The thing is though is that I”m just trying to get together the ideology for what I would like to do. It’s kind of like I”m checking out some option while continue what I am currently involved in because that seems to be good.  And then there are a few other things I should probably try but I”m not sure if I want to strike out that way or if I should just keep on like this.  Usually though I would probably just do it the way I started.

I think that I am going to be looking for something to help keep my apartment a bit cleaner.  I’m not talking about vacuums or anything like that, but I need to get something to keep the dust and stuff out of the air because I don’t know why but it can get dusty.  They say that air purifiers can help with that but I really have no idea if that is true or not, so I’m trying to categorically do some research on them and see if I can find anything about whether or not they work.  The first thing I did was go to bestbuy.com and see what they had in stock but they didn’t really have that many because although they have some home appliances, they are mostly known for selling other types of things.  Then I checked

Amazon.com

And I found this one: click this.

It seems to have good reviews and people are pretty satisfied I guess.  I also found a review of it here.

I don’t know.  The thing that I worry about is if it is going to take up a lot of space.  There were a few air purifiers that I saw online that were really big and I don’t really have room for anything like that so I need a small one that can fit on a tight space on a desk I think.  The other thing I was thinking about is whether or not you have to change the filter and if you can just clean it off or if you have to replace it.  I’m sure it’s not that big of a deal either way but I figure that that is something else to keep in mind.  I just want to make sure my place is clean and I’m not going to be having any more dust that I already have flying around.  The other air purifiers I looked at seem to have a few different settings so I think they might be able to be changed based on what kind of room they are in or whether or not they are doing a lot of filtering or just a little.  It’s really something that would be a good idea to learn more before making a purchase.  Maybe I’ll find a model I like better than that Whispure up there but that’s the one that I’m reading about and it sounds like it will probably do what I am looking for so I’m kind of thinking that will be the one for my apartment.

You can’t see the back yard

I have been thinking about how I want to make a few changes to my home.  For starters, I need to change up the way my floors look.  I’ve got carpet and I really just want to pull it all up and replace it with tile or wood.  I didn’t even know that you could put tile in your whole house because I had really only ever seen it in the kitchen, but apparently this is really the way some people do it and when I saw a few examples of it I thought it looked really nice.  So finding the right style is going to be a bit of an adventure since it’s all new territory.

I also need to make some big changes to the outside of my house.  I am going to repair some of the cracks in our driveway and then the rest of the changes I’m going to make are in the back yard.  There is a big area where I want to have our deck expanded.  We’ve got a deck right now but it’s not really that big and I’m thinking hat there is definitely room to add on to it and make it bigger, which will mean I can have more things out there and I’ll have more space for when I have parties.  I’m also going to make some changes to my garden.  I want to get a few little decorative things to put in it, and I’m going to get some aluminium garden furniture so that if people go off the deck they’ll have some place to sit.  I mean what’s the point of having a big back yard if you’re not going to use it?

When I am considering what to put back there, I have also been looking online and some of the back yard styles and the way people have them set up.  There are some really nice looking yards out there and it makes mine look so blah by comparison.  But because I have a relatively large area back there I want to do something so that it can all be used rather than just having a normal back yard that no one really does and you just go back there and stay on the deck.

Both of these things are going to require some more research from me, however, because there are so many options and I haven’t decided how I want to make the changes.

I was talking to my friend a few days ago and she told me she just found out that she  is pregnant.  She said that she knew she had been really excited and was wanting to tell me.  I told her that she was going to need to start finding out about all the things that you need to do as a new mom.  She said she knew and was ready to talk about them.

She also told me that she was looking at different types of things you can get for a newborn like pacifiers and stuffed animals and all of those.  I said she should make sure that she gets some educational stuff so her baby can be smart.

She told me that she didn’t know at first that there were so many options for baby toys.

She also said she didn’t know exactly how pregnant you had to be before you would develop a big stomach.  She said she wasn’t sure when exactly she got pregnant and was wondering “how many weeks pregnant am I?”

I think she is going to be one of those people who tries to do everything they can to make sure their items and everything they have are ready for a baby.  I also think that she’s going to get a lot of books and stuff and read to her baby because I know that is something that is important to her.

One of the other things we were talking about was how you should know if you should put your kid in preschool or anything liek that.  Of course some people have differing opinions about it but for now we were just talking about some random things.  That’s not something she has to know now anyway until it gets to the point where her kid is ready.  I think she’s going to be interested in that though because I think there are some classes that can get your kids ready.  Anyway, she kept talking about it and tell me all about all the stuff she wants to do.  I think she is really going to be into the whole being a mom thing but I don’t know if that will change at all once she realizes that having kids is going to be a lot of involvement.  I think though that she is going to really like doing most of the stuff that is involved.

I’m all for honesty. Though I’ve been guilty of withholding the truth before, it always comes out. I have a compulsive need to bare everything to the person I’m with including uncertainties about the relationship.

But something about his statements is rubbing me the wrong way… if they haven’t talked about stuff like this before, it has no context and I would definitely consider him insensitive or at least very naive to express feelings like that in such an offhand way.

It’s not like he’s saying “I’m conflicted. I love you and I don’t want our relationship to end, but sometimes I experience feelings toward other people. Let’s talk about it.” Instead it doesn’t sound like he’s really interested in her input at all. He’s already thought about it himself and come to his own conclusions. The reassurances he gave her after the fact sound more like patting himself on the back.

Disagree strongly. Sharing is not a virtue unto itself. Being “open” when the one and only purpose is to cause harm and disharmony is an unmitigated evil. Causing harm for 0 benefit is causing harm, even if its the truth.

Not to mention is wording/approach was intentionally hurtful/incendiary.

My first gut feelings totally agree with you guys. I don’t understand why he would think it is OK to do all the things they did – hang out outside of work environment so much. And while I appreciate the honesty, I think maybe the disappointment part is something you share with buddies, not necessarily SO. However open and honest the relationship may be.

There is no way for them to be together. She now has a long term live in bf herself, and they live in another country other than the US. What happened between them was more than 10 years ago, and it was a very short flame. Even though they see each other here and there over the years, this is the first time in more than 10 years that they actually got to spend time like this.

He said she is just being a good friend. That’s all. I, on the other hand, have doubts. They had maybe a little too much fun and his feelings are very concerning to me. I also genuinely believe that he loves me and don’t want our relationship to end. (I hope I am not wrong as some of you are saying maybe he is being a gigantic jerk to force me to end things.) But the conclusion is, they did not do anything wrong and he focuses on the part that “nothing happened”. So I have no idea how to process this.

I talked to my friends about this. Male friends would say “well he didn’t cheat on you.” And female friends would say “what an insensitive jerk.” Very conflicted all over the place.

I’ve noticed this for a while, but I am starting to see it more, or maybe I just pay attention to it more. Anyway, I have trouble completing some tasks without either getting bored and starting something else or just get a dying urge to complete it and hurry up and half ass it to just get over with it.

Today was a good example. I started to empty out the dishwasher and make something for lunch at the same time. Well, lunch was done before the dishwasher was empty (just microwaved something), so I left the dishwasher and had lunch. But then I wanted to clean up the garage before it got too late. So, I started cleaning up the garage. Then, I wanted to wash the car before it got dark. After the car was washed, I wanted to go to the store before the close. By the time I got back from the store, I was too tired to finish cleaning up the garage or empty out the dishwasher.

So, I got the dishwasher half emptied, the garage about a third of the way cleaned up the car washed and went to the stores I had to go to.

I tend to do this fairly often and I know this is a lame example, but its the most recent. I can’t think of any others right now.

This post isn’t particularly about today, but just in general. I don’t know if this is about poor planning, lack of concern, lack of time, ADD or something else.

Now, I do work a lot, average 11 hour days and 6 days a week, sometimes 75 hours or more in 7 days. Partially by choice to make some extra $$$ to pay for things I want, like furniture, since I recently purchased my first home and that’s where most of the money goes. I also work hard and most of my week consists of working and sleeping (yes I know that’s sad and there is A LOT more to life than work). But its only for a little while until I get situated in my new home. I am fortunate to have a job with decent pay that allows me to work a good amount of overtime to be able to afford a home in California and a few other toys. This doesn’t leave a whole lot of time to get other things done during the week.

I’ve always been like this, but I guess I notice it more now that I don’t have as much time to myself. It seems to happen more in my personal life that at work, but I know I do it at work also. Any opinions?

I think I need to get organized. I’ve been using a little pocket planner type notebook and i jot down things i need to get done today and my gosh, I’m finally free of stress because it helps me take care of things quickly and in an orderly fashion….plus it gives me a sense of control in my life.

My sister is moving.  I’m jealous, although I can’t say Cedar Park would be my first choice of places to move if I could move anywhere I wanted.  Check out this email she sent me:

We are relocating to Cedar Park, Texas thanks to my husband getting a nice little promotion at his job. The good thing is they are paying for all of our moving expenses so now I just have to find where we are going to live. My husband isn’t picky so he is going to let me choose. All he wants is a deck or patio where he can set up his charcoal grill and smoker. He grills out all the time which is something I don’t mind as he makes some pretty good food and more so I don’t have to cook. I’ll make side dishes to accompany whatever he makes but that’s about it. I have spent the better part of this morning looking at homes for sale.

The rest of the day I am going to spend with my friend Julia. She is redecorating her own home and wants my expertise. I don’t work right now but if I did I could easily be an interior designer as I have a pretty good knack for it. It drives my husband nuts as I am always updating different rooms in our house. The only one I’m not allowed to mess with is his little man cave as he calls it that is downstairs. He has one of those sectional sofas down there along with his big screen HDTV to watch games. He always invites over a bunch of his friends during the NFL season to watch the Cowboys. That is now that I’m thinking about it one other thing that the new place must have and that is a finished basement. He told me he basically wants the same layout which is fine. I would like to have our washer and dryer upstairs if at all possible so I don’t even have to go down in the basement anymore so I’ll be looking for that too.

Ok well I’m going to wrap this up soon and get moving. I still have to take a shower and she lives a good 45 minutes away. The good thing is when we move she will be a lot closer (like 20 minutes away) so that will be nice. I don’t use the term best friend now that I’m an adult but if I had to pick somebody as one she would be it. We have known each other forever and get along really well so yeah.